Editor’s Note: Valentine’s Day~ Husband 1.0


This funny spoof is circulating on the Internet and I thought I’d share it today!

Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from  Boyfriend 5.0  to  Husband 1.0  and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under  Boyfriend 5.0.   In addition,  Husband 1.0  uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as  Romance 9.5  and  Personal Attention 6.5,  and then installed undesirable programs such as  NBA 5.0,  NFL 3.0  and  Golf Clubs 4.1.   Finally, Conversation 8.0  no longer runs, and  Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

Please note that I have tried running  Nagging 5.3  to fix these problems, but to no avail.  What can I do?

signed, Desperate Valentine

Dear Desperate Valentine,

First, keep in mind,  Boyfriend 5.0  is an Entertainment Package, while  Husband 1.0  is an operating system.  Please go to:  www.ithoughtyoulovedme.org and try to download  and install Tears 6.2  with the Guilt 3.0  update.

If that application works as designed,  Husband 1.0  should then automatically run the applications  Jewelry 2.0  and  Flowers 3.5.     Remember, overuse of the above application can cause  Husband 1.0  to default to  Grumpy Silence 2.5,  Happy Hour  7.0 or  Beer 6.1.     Please note that  Beer 6.1  is a very bad program that will download the  Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do,  DO NOT  under any circumstances install  Mother-In-Law  1.0  (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)   In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the  Boyfriend  5.0 program.   These are unsupported applications and will crash  Husband 1.0.

In summary,  Husband 1.0  is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.   You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.   We recommend  Cooking 3.0  and  Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck and  Happy Valentines Day!
Tech Support



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